panic attack

Tightness begins to threaten my throat, like hands grabbing at me out of nowhere. No! Not again! There’s a whooshing sound in my ears; I can hear the beat of my heart and my breath inside of them. Is this really happening? This can’t be happening. Blue eyes rapidly scan my surroundings as peripheral vision turns black. Losing focus. Everywhere I look is too open, but too crowded; too small, but too big. Too many noises entering my whooshing ears. Too many sounds cluttering my cluttered brain. I’m looking for the Exit sign, but there is no exit sign. I am trapped in my own mind. Running around in circles, throwing myself at the walls of my skull. My breath becomes more and more heavy, shallow, heavy, shallow.  Which one is it? What am I saying, I can’t breathe! Not normally anyways. Lungs banging against the cage in my chest, begging for more air. But instead, it fills my stomach as my worst fear taps on my shoulder. Telling me that the inevitable is here. But is it? I can’t trust my own judgment anymore! Arms and legs move too much, or not at all. Face twitching, I cough to make it all stop but of course it’s not working. I’m glued down, yet somehow still coming unglued. My eyes are hazy with tears building up, and before I know it I’m screaming. Or am I? Nothing comes out. Just my mouth wide open as the tears fall like summer rain. I’m alone, with no one around to help me. It is crowded, but no one knows how to assist the grown woman who sits silently in the corner.

written by jaceycaitlynspeaks  ©2017
daily prompt: Panicked